In the Morning

 Today was a good day filled with happy moments. The littles were up bright and early and as we whispered, poured bowls of cheerios and listened to our favorite primary songs my heart was full. With Daddy gone to early morning meetings, the big kids have really stepped up to the plate to help me out with the younger ones. There is something special about watching an older child take someone younger under their wing. We recently started a "buddy system" where we pair up an older buddy with a younger buddy and it has been a huge game changer. They are more aware of each other's needs and try really hard during the week to take care of their assigned buddy and help where it's needed. This morning Hyrum watched Sawyer while I got ready for church, Camilla helped dress Ollie, and Joe played with Fin quietly. 

When we got to church I put a very sleepy Sawyer in the sling and made my way to our bench with the rest of the littles. I was better able to manage a busy toddler and disagreeable preschooler with both hands free. It didn't take long for Sawyer to drift off to sleep and everyone to settle in. I paused part way through the meeting when I noticed how closely everyone was gathered around me. I had Joe sitting on my left side, Sawyer snuggled on my chest, Camilla on my right side with Ollie on her lap resting his head on her shoulder, and Hyrum next to her entertaining Finley. In that brief moment I felt so blessed as a mamma, to be surrounded by all of my littles. It didn't take long for a few of the younger ones to get restless though and thankfully Gramma and Grampa were at the end of the bench to help. Not all days are perfect, but I am grateful for moments like these where time stands still and we are able to enjoy what we have.

In primary a few months ago the kids learned that faith is like a little seed. They planted these pansies and each of my littles brought a pot home. They're so pretty!

 After a great visit with friends in the afternoon, I loved finishing up my day walking around the Acreage next to this guy and watching the sun sink behind the trees. It's always nice to reconnect often and regroup. 

 I stumbled across a song today that I felt really described motherhood and life in general.  I've had a few rough mommy moments this week and I am forever grateful for the fresh start each day, and for a Savior who's arms are steady and always ready to embrace us.

"It's been a long day, and you did your best
Let go of the past, it's time now to rest
The weight of the world is getting too heavy
Give it to Jesus, His arms are steady

And your heart will feel lighter
Everything will be brighter
Find peace in knowing
That all will be well in the morning
In the morning
All will be well
All will be well in the morning"

~JJ Heller

World Cup

 We spent the majority of our day at the soccer field today! Hyrum and Joe participated in the World Cup tournament and had a fun afternoon of soccer! They had a pretty good cheering squad between Daddy, Grampa and I, along with Ollie who loved chanting "Go JOE! Go JOE!" over and over and over. They've learned a lot already this year and it's so fun seeing their confidence grow on the field. Joe loves running around and only stopped moving when he was in net. He told me after that he scored ten goals (but I know how much he likes to exaggerate). He played well though and had fun! The highlight for him was receiving his medal and a brand new soccer ball at the end of the day. Hyrum zipped around the field and hustled hard after the ball. He is learning to pass to his team mates and look around the field a little bit more. He ran the ball down so many times and almost scored a few balls. He also was super tough when he got the ball kicked in his face. At the beginning of the season he wasn't sure if he wanted to play, but now he tells me he loves soccer even more than hockey or any other sport, so I'm glad I followed my intuition and registered him this year. He would have been terribly bored watching his brother play all season.  Good job boys!

A Drizzly Day

 It was another cold, rainy day today and I didn't mind in the least. There is something about the chill in the air and the fresh smell of rain that brings a feeling of peace and a sense of calm. I hung out in the greenhouse while it drizzled rain on and off. The little boys played in the sandbox, oblivious to the falling drops. Grampa would fill their buckets with water every time they came into the greenhouse and then they would lug them back to the sand box to play some more.

I finally got around to planting my pumpkin plants! It's something I've never grown before so I'm excited about it!

I also discovered that Sawyer needs somewhere to hang out while I help Grampa water/weed the greenhouse. We found the perfect solution! This swing was a gift from my brother when he came back from Nicaragua and it has been through all of my boys!

After getting Ollie down for his nap, my Mom and I escaped to town to buy some plants. I've been wanting to visit The Plant Ranch for a while now and even though it was rainy, it smelled and looked lovely!

I refrained from buying everything in sight, and got some awesome ideas for next year!

We also found some Honey Berries (Haskaps) and picked one up to replace the one that didn't make it last year.

And a rainy day wouldn't be complete without a batch of cookies. The first pan made it out of the oven just before the kids arrived home from school. They were pleasantly surprised! I had to stash half of the double batch in a container in the cupboard so they wouldn't eat them all before the next day.

Sawyer: Six Months

It's so hard to believe that we have already had half a year with our Smiley Sawyer. He has been a dreamy sixth baby and fits in perfectly. At six months he is rolling and moving around. If he is on his back he can kick his way across a room. I often find him crying in his crib with his head stuck against the bars because he only moves one direction right now. 

He is so close to sitting up on his own and has started getting his tummy off the ground during tummy time. He's been working on those core muscles and I'm sure he will be crawling before we know it! 

We've had a few crazy puking sessions after a small bowl of rice cereal, so we've paused our grain intake for now and are sticking with fruits and veggies. Nursing around the clock is sometimes difficult and most days I feel like I don't get much else done around here. He's got some nice thigh and wrist rolls and is growing so well!

He also just cut his first tooth! I didn't think his smile could get any cuter, but it did! Happy six months Sawyer.

Hello Gorgeous

 It was a long, long night. Camilla slept in my bed since Daddy was away and by the time morning rolled around I had three children in my bed. Hyrum walked in at 7:00am and exclaimed in a whisper, "EVERYONE is in your bed!" I drew my finger to my lips to shh him and then snuck out of bed shortly after Camilla and Ollie, leaving a sleepy baby in the middle. Hyrum and Joe excitedly told me how they had already been outside to play in the sunshine and fresh morning air. It was a gorgeous day!

 Finley was still sound asleep on the couch while the morning sun poured in the front window. I threw his bedding in the wash late last night and sent him to the couch to sleep. 

We took advantage of the warm weather and walked to the bus stop at the end of the lane. The boys loved waving off the big kids to school and the fresh morning air was so nice. 

Sawyer woke up with his first tooth yesterday! He was super happy through it all, but woke up for snuggles a few more times during the night. Now he is back to long naps for the next little while until the next tooth decides to make an appearance. 

The hens are enjoying the warmer weather and love being outside scratching up grub. I love going out to the coop in the afternoon to gather the eggs and can't wait for our new hens to come online soon!

Enough

Today was a good day, but definitely left me feeling drained and like I didn't give enough to everyone and everything demanding my attention. My breakfast dishes sat on the table all day and were only cleared when I finally served dinner. The little boys and I were gone all morning and arrived home just in time for naps. Fin and Ollie both ended up napping which I am now regretting as they are still not asleep. 

I rushed off to pick up the kids for piano and soccer shortly after the little boys fell asleep (thanks Mom and Dad for watching them) and didn't get home until dinner. Sawyer is teething which has turned him into a huge mamma's boy and our nights have been terrible. Soccer practice was freezing cold again with a little less wind than last time. Sawyer snuggled in the sling and fell asleep while I blew the whistle every ten minutes to let them know when to rotate stations. When I got home I simultaneously made bread dough, dinner, and a cup of hot tea (to thaw my frozen bones from soccer) while the baby whined in the highchair. I really made a conscious effort over dinner not to look at the clock or worry about the time. We chatted about school and what we all did today while everyone slowly ate. Camilla and Ollie danced around the kitchen to music and we all took turns picking songs and laughing together. 

As soon as dinner finished there was hardly time to clean up since I wanted to get the ball rolling on the bedtime routine. Most of the littles grabbed jammies out of baskets of clean clothes that have been waiting to be folded for days. I feel like my washing machine pretty much runs non-stop trying to keep us all in clean clothes. After everyone was jammied we jumped on my bed for a quick scripture study and night prayers and then brushed teeth. The older three read and wrote in their journals while I tucked in the younger two (who got out of bed shortly there after). The baby was starving and hadn't eaten since just before soccer, so I rushed through tucking in the older boys trying to thank them for their help and being awesome for their coaches. 

By this time the bread dough was oozing over the edges of the bowl and needing to be put into pans. I read Camilla a few pages of Heidi while nursing the baby to sleep, but when I put him in his crib he woke up right away. Camilla helped me make the cheese buns for lunches and then I tucked her in and sat on the couch with a cranky baby. As I surveyed the damage (toy bins all over the living room, costumes dumped on the floor, blocks everywhere, the vacuum still out because I intended on using it today, my crochet project stuffed in the corner waiting to be finished, the dishes stacked on the counter, dinner needing to be put away) I began to feel very overwhelmed.

There is never enough hours in the day to accomplish all that needs doing. I am often up hours after the children have gone to bed folding laundry, cleaning up the kitchen, or making school snacks, because it's the only time I can actually be productive. Then I wake up at the crack of dawn to feed them breakfast and get some morning snuggles which leaves me exhausted by the early afternoon. For the most part I've adopted the attitude that whatever doesn't get done today will (most likely) get done tomorrow. Some days this is harder to do than others and today is one of those days.  Sometimes I think it would be really nice to have a clean house and be able to walk through my kitchen without my socks sticking to the floor because someone made themselves a jelly sandwich and ate it all over the house. For now I am just trying my best to roll with the punches and embrace the chaos. 

More importantly though, I constantly worry if I am giving my children the individual attention they deserve. Am I listening well enough? Am I asking the right questions? Am I spending enough time with them? Did I give them enough hugs? Did I forget to feed anyone today? Did I lose my patience too many times? Has someone gone to sleep feeling lonely or left out because of something I did or didn't do? Is anyone getting lost in the shuffle? Sometimes even after I go to bed for the night these thoughts swirl through my head filling me with doubt and making sleep slow to come. 

Motherhood has stretched me in ways that I never knew it would. The levels of exhaustion a mother functions on are unreal. The sleepless nights are relentless. The demands are endless. There is no completing one job before moving on to the next. In my role I am constantly circling from one thing to another before actually completing a task. But I am grateful for the way this role has refined me and continues to teach me about serving selflessly and doing small things with great love.

But now my nose is telling me that the cheese buns are ready to come out of the oven and I think I am definitely going to eat one and have another cup of tea because it's looking like I have another long night ahead of me.

First Boat Ride

 This morning Mr. Stannix changed the dead battery on the truck so that he could pick up the boat! He has been anticipating this day for quite some time now and eagerly waiting for the weather to warm up. The littles helped him uncover the boat and load up the life jackets and then we took off to the lake after lunch. The older three were begging to blow up the tube to go for a ride but mamma knows best. It was a cold and windy day and I knew that once we got out there no one would want to ride the tube. I made sure to pack extra sweaters and jackets for disbelieving children and they were sure grateful for them once we got on the water!

 Last season we were blessed to always have an extra adult accompany us on the boat which made unloading and loading so much easier. Since one of us had to park the truck, half of the kids got in the boat before we launched it and the big boys held a rope on the dock in case the boat wouldn't start. Luckily she fired up on the third try and Mr. Stannix didn't get blown half way across the lake. 

 The water was choppy and the wind was cold. We had to work the kids over their fears again and take our time on the water. Our cautious Camilla was not happy at all about the rocking boat and the speed. But Mr. Stannix was so happy to be out on the lake again!

 Ollie white knuckled this bar the entire time the boat was in motion. When we got out the oreo cookies for snack Ollie kept asking, "Can we please go eat on the cement?" He hasn't quite given up his land legs yet it seems! 

 The sun came out a few times and it was so nice when it did! The big boys rode up front and enjoyed the wind and the spray on their faces.

 We spent a lot of time just floating around in the middle of the lake eating snacks and listening to music.

We lasted about an hour before we decided to call it a day and head back home. I had forgotten about winching in the boat to the trailer when we load and ended up having to wade waist deep into the chilly water. The wind made it difficult to load, but we managed ok! Everyone is already talking about tubing and knee boarding. Now we just need the weather to cooperate! We finished off our evening around a campfire with friends and came home smelling of smoke and lake air. My face is sore and I can't tell if it's from the wind, the sun, or smiling too much. It was a great end to the long weekend!

Sunday Snapshot

We had a pretty crazy Sunday! I hardly had time to sit and listen to anything because I was constantly hauling children out of the meeting! After church Hyrum and Joe helped set up chairs for the potluck. It made my mamma heart proud to watch them helping and serving. Hyrum has really grown and matured over the last little bit and I love watching his quiet ways and his desire to be good. Hyrum sat next to his cub leader and Joe sat next to his piano teacher and the two of them chatted their poor ears off the entire time. On the way home from church I was thanking the boys for helping out with the chairs and Hyrum said, "I want to be good for the rest of my life, it makes me feel so happy." I love that he recognized the good feeling he got after serving and knew that he wanted to feel that way always. It was such a simple, but profound statement. Even though I changed two poopy diapers during the potluck and sometimes feel like I can't juggle one more thing on Sundays, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's so nice seeing the older kids willing to help and serve in and outside of our home. Soon I will have big strong boys to carry my groceries, lift heavy things and hold doors open for me. And while I look forward to those days, there's a small part of me that doesn't want these days to end anytime soon. 

May Long

 We kicked off our May Long Weekend with some long time friends! Our desire to see them outweighed our great desire to stay home and have a quiet weekend, they are just that good! We enjoyed a super low key fire shortly after arriving, roasting hot dogs and eating smores. The boys love their huge trees and had fun playing games and jumping on hay bales. We also got to enjoy their new pup, Monty, who is just the sweetest. I was too busy enjoying our visit around the fire that I only managed a couple of pictures. The girls were off playing together, so I didn't get any of the two of them! We always enjoy good conversation and deep discussions about various things. All of our kiddos sprawled out around the basement in sleeping bags when bedtime rolled around and slept soundly until morning. We enjoyed a morning of play and fresh air before heading home. 

Soccer Mom

I sure do love watching these boys every week even if it takes me a few hours to thaw out after each practise, it's totally worth it!