Sun Showers

Hats off to Grampa

 My Grampa Hudkins celebrated his 80th birthday this month. My cousin Jenny organized a little birthday party to celebrate Grampa and his amazing life. We are so blessed to be able to know him. I love that my kids will have memories of their great-grampa and I love watching him with them.

 My Mom did an awesome job putting together three hat cakes to celebrate our theme "Hats off to Grampa". They turned out great and were super delish!

 I loved this little display table filled with things that remind us of Grampa.When I was growing up they lived in Fort McMurray which was quite a long drive. I can still remember visiting and eating mini cereals and Jello puddings that they would pick up especially for us. Another thing I love about my grandparents is the fact that you can never leave their home without sharing a meal. If you go around lunch time campbells soup is always a favorite, or peanut butter and honey (sometimes banana) sandwiches. I've always thought there was wisdom in gathering us around the kitchen table for a meal where we can enjoy good conversation and receive advice or help with things we might be struggling with. It's amazing the way that a kitchen table can open conversation and I admire them for making that possible. They have always been such a great example to me. 

 There was also tons of pictures put up of Grampa through the years. It was so fun to look through them!

Camilla and Amelia were excited to be reunited!

These two are so cute together! Such great second cousin friends.

 Loved being able to see the grandparents with grands and great-grands.

 This picture of Finley totally steals my heart! Photo credit for most of these goes to my sister and her brand new camera. Also loving my mamma and little Joe.

 All of our kids went and sat with second cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents so Mr. Stannix and I were kind of left solo. It felt weird, but it was a good breather!

 We finished off the evening writing birthday wishes to Grampa for a special book and playing a game to learn more about Grampa. He is a pretty amazing guy and I teared up every time my cousin Jenny mentioned how lucky we are to have him. We are truly blessed!

Before we left we each took a group picture with Grampa and some random hats that my cousin brought to suit the theme. It's always so fun to celebrate with family! We sure love Grampa Hudkins!

It Goes by Fast

At the grocery store today I was stopped by a sweet lady who told me about a time when she was shopping with her five children and an older lady stopped her to tell her how fast the time goes. As I was politely listening and shuffling children out of the aisle so the stock boy could get by, she put her hand on my shoulder, smiled, and said, "Now I'm that old lady, and I want you to know, it does go by so fast! And I know you probably hear that a lot, but it really does." I thanked her for the advice, and we all waved good-bye as we carried on through the store. As I left, I couldn't help but smile, because it's going by so fast! I took a deep breath and enjoyed the chaos of grocery shopping. I studied Joseph's face as he talked to me from the seat in the cart and leaned over to kiss his baby brother who was strapped onto me in the carrier. I admired Hyrum's gorgeous blue eyes as he stood on the end of the cart, quietly soaking in his surroundings. My heart welled up with love for my big girl, always so eager to help and guide her little brothers.

Once we got to the van I began unloading groceries and miss Camilla sympathetically said, "Being a mommy is hard, I know. I'm kinda a mommy in training." It made my heart happy. I hope one day she will value motherhood as much as I do. On the way home I found myself with tears brimming in my eyes as I pulled up to a stop light and took a few seconds to look at the kids in the rear view mirror and express to them how much I love each of them.

I spent the rest of the day soaking in the present, studying my kids, and really getting down to their level. Joseph fell asleep on the way home from the store and as I carried him up to his bed his body melted into mine and it made me miss the days when he was tiny and fit just right snuggled up on my shoulder. While he slept the older kids played quietly on the floor with Finley and I unloaded the groceries. I loved the feeling of peace and calm that filled our home in that moment.

When all of the groceries were finally put away, I sat on the couch and watched Finley drift off to sleep while he nursed. I snuggled him for a few extra minutes before laying him in his crib. On my way downstairs I heard Joseph moving around in his bed and peeked through the crack in his door. I love catching him just when he wakes up, scooping him into my arms and stealing some snuggles. He gladly wrapped his arms around my neck and put his head on my shoulder as we made our way downstairs.

By now his tummy was grumbling and as we exchanged whispers he pulled a box of kraft dinner out of the pantry and we went to work making it together. I'm always amused at how much praise a cheap little box of kraft dinner gets at the table. The kids turn up their noses most nights after slaving away at a healthy meal. Sometimes it's refreshing to make something easy and soak in all of the compliments and praises.

Once Finley woke from his nap the hushed tones gradually got louder again as the children engaged in games of make-believe. When I changed Finley's diaper he peed all over the floor (and me) which inspired me to tidy the main floor and give it a good mop. I bathed Finley, changed my clothes, and went to work tidying while the children whizzed around me in their make-believe world. I love how well the kids play together and will miss days like these when Camilla goes off to school next year.

After I finished, Finley and I snuggled up on the couch for a few minutes. He grabbed my face with his chubby fingers and planted a few wet ones on my cheek. His sweet smiles, high pitched giggle and happy demeanor make him so easy to love. I flashed back to quiet afternoon snuggles with each of my babies and thought about how quickly they've morphed into these little people they are today. It feels like just yesterday.

It wasn't long before everyone else was hovering around us or squishing next to us on the couch to smooch their baby brother too. I couldn't help but smile at Hyrum who insisted on wearing his super man costume that fit him at 18 months. The pant legs were up to his knees and he had no clothes underneath just to make it fit. The back doesn't do up anymore leaving his farmers tan totally visible from behind.

I put away Joseph's booster seat because he is always wanting to sit in a big chair anyways. Camilla ate a ton of spinach salad tonight which has never happened before! A sure sign that she is indeed growing up. She couldn't get enough of that stuff. And then before we knew it bed time had come again. These days go by quicker and quicker it seems and then all of the sudden it's a new week again, and then a new month. I seriously can't believe we are already coming up to June!

Daddy and I tucked everyone in for the night and then he went off to hockey. Finley has already been up multiple times and I know I'm in for another rough night. I can't wait for these teeth to come in, but at the same time, I am hanging onto every moment and stage with this little guy after going through it so many times. I love that simply holding him can sooth him. I love our night time cuddles and early morning snoozes on the couch. Sometimes when I'm holding him I can't help but kiss the top of his fuzzy little head, soak in the baby smells, and hold him for just a few minutes longer.

 It's been this way with each of my kids these days. When Hyrum gives me morning hugs I am left wishing that he would hold on for just a few minutes longer. After Joseph has fallen asleep I find myself lying in his bed for just a few minutes longer, running my fingers through his hair and studying his little face, letting go of everything that happened that day. And when I tuck in my big girl and she chats my ear off, I want so badly to sit on the edge of her bed and listen to her talk to me all night long, because I know that this won't last forever. My favorite line of hers tonight was "I'm just going to file that in my head so I don't forget tomorrow morning." I sure hope these chats will always happen, especially when she gets older.

Today I am grateful for the reminder that the ordinary is extraordinary. I suppose that's one of my biggest reasons for blogging, is to hang onto these little moments and remember my kids as they are today with all of their funny sayings and quirks. There is so much going on in our world these days that can distract us from living in the present. It feels good to be back on track.

The Story About a Princess

 This afternoon I stacked the dishes in the sink, ignored the crumb topped counters, let the slow cooker do it's thing, and played with the kids. While Joseph was napping Camilla excitedly came to me with the idea of creating a book. She asked for two sheets of paper and help with the stapler. 

She then drew out her title page and story and asked me for help with the words. Her title read "The Stooee Ubow U Prises". My mother heart smiled as she read the title to me. She really tried hard. After I helped her spell the words, she read the story to me.

My favorite was when she got to the end and said, "I know it looks like they're scared, but they're just kissing." Love those stick people with their puckered up lips. Her drawings still make me smile and I can't wait to look back at these pictures down the road. Another favorite line of hers today happened when I was upstairs and they were downstairs. They had just turned on a kids show and I heard Camilla in her hilarious, sarcastic tone say, "Well THAT'S going to haunt my dreams!" She's so funny and definitely made me smile today!

Rough N' Tumble

 Afternoons are sometimes rough. With a late bedtime for the kiddos, an early start to the day, and a fun morning at the park, I decided to put Joe for a nap. While he was sleeping Camilla got in some reading and a work sheet. Joseph woke up sweaty and SUPER cranky, and I wanted to send him right back to bed. Instead we plopped down on the couch and I tried to calm him with the worlds longest hug (while he whimpered for a hug) and nurse/console Finley all at the same time. My lap was full. No amount of hugging or loving was calming Joe, so we got comfy and decided to just wait it out. For the next half hour he cried on my lap while I closed my eyes and tried my darndest not to nod off. Eventually I layed him down beside me because I was too tired to sit there anymore. Before I knew it, Finley started making eyes at him and giggling. I plopped him down on Joseph and all of the sudden I had my smiley two year old back. Next time I will definitely pull that card a whole lot sooner. They were so cute I had to take a picture.

Then before I knew it it was time to tidy up the house and get dinner in the oven so that we could skip off to soccer.  Dinner produced a nice mixture of emotions ranging from yum-I-love-this to there's-no-way-in-the-world-I'm-going-to-eat-this. With the clock ticking away I tried to convince one child he was old enough to feed himself, while another child licked his plate clean and requested seconds and the last child took their time to enjoy it. I topped up Finley and reminded them to keep eating from the livingroom. Then we put our shoes on and raced out the door to drive to the field. Hyrum played super well! 

And when you look like this at the end of a long day, you just know it's been a good one!

Go Bananas

Today was a bit of a nutty day. One of my favorite moments from today was watching Joseph take on the role of a doting, loving older brother. He adores his baby brother and loves to try and feed him. Today we tried bananas for the first time. It was quite the adventure!

Love this "proud big brother" face.

Camilla had to get in on the action too, but Finley wasn't really feeling the bananas. After his nap he woke up and puked all over the both of us and then some. It just kept getting worse and soon the poor guy was puking but had nothing left to come up. It was the saddest thing ever. Health link recommended going to a walk-in clinic or Emerg. I tried my luck at our clinic and ended up waiting there for over four hours with all the littles in tow since Daddy was away at a course. Finley finally nursed after five hours of puking, which made me feel a bit better. By the time the doctor could see us he was smiling more and wiggling around again. The doctor didn't think it was a reaction to the bananas but didn't have any answers as to what it could have been. All of my research says bananas are a great first food and easy on the tummy. Not sure if we'll try bananas again for a while...

The Legislature

Today we woke up and left bright and early for a morning at the legislature. If you ask Camilla she'll tell you it was her idea, but Daddy's idea to go today. I was so excited to see the pink blossoms on the trees and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I love being out with the people I love most. It was fun watching the kids and their different personalities as they explored. We got there pretty early in the day and had the whole place to ourselves. The water was brisk, but still fun to dip our feet and relax. We spent a good chunk of time in each of the wading pools and finished off with the deepest one. We all had a lot of fun and I am looking forward to many more visits this Summer!

Out and About

We have been taking full advantage of this warm weather! This week we hit up a few favorite parks around the city and even had our first spray park experience of the season. Finley went on a tiny swing ride. Given the fact that he can't quite sit yet, he just kind of hung out while I pushed Joseph. I could munch those leg rolls all day though!!

A Time and Season

I have being thinking a lot lately about this particular season in my life. The season where my days are full and busy but I feel like I get nothing accomplished. The season where our days start at the crack of dawn (or even before that) and I feel like I'm constantly making food. The other night before bed I sat in the rocker nursing Finley and began thinking about all of the things I wanted to accomplish. I wanted so badly to submit an essay for publishing, but the deadline is at the end of the month and there is no way I will make it. I want to craft and create and make our home beautiful, but I can't seem to find the time for that either. Sometimes I long for the "me" before I become a mom. The me who enjoyed sports on a daily basis, and had time to play the piano with feeling and emotion (and not the kids pounding on the base notes or screaming at your feet kind of emotion either). And as I sat and thought, and missed "me" I let a few tears fall. I love being a mother with all my heart, and my life is nothing short of amazing, but some times the days are so long and trying that I ache for my "old" life.

The kids have been spending most of their time outdoors lately and I think all of the extra fresh air is tuckering them out. The last few mornings they have slept until after 7:00am which is a miracle around here. The first morning Joseph slept in Finley woke early, peed all over his crib when I changed him, and then overflowed his diaper with poop moments later. The next morning I was able to blend a smoothie and send Daddy off to work and even enjoy a few minutes to myself before I heard their little feet clunk down the stairs. Mornings always go better when I can wake up before them and collect my thoughts. 

Yesterday we had an awesome start to the morning. I signed up for a 5K run in July with my siblings and have been procrastinating training for it. Now that the littles are good on their bikes I've decided to push the younger boys in the double stroller while the older two peddle their hearts out a few mornings a week. I'm pretty sure we did around 3K (with lots of water breaks for the littles). I was quite impressed with them and their little legs! It felt good to run again and do something I used to be so passionate about. 

After a quick shower we took off to conquer Costco. I was in need of a few things and I am in love with their triangle buns. I met up with an old friend who told me I was brave to come to Costco with four littles. I smiled and thanked her for the compliment. Then I got about ten "wow! You've got your hands full!" comments. And then there was a sweet lady who came up while I stood in line at the checkout and asked, "Is this your family?" I proudly told her, "yes". And she went on to compliment me and praise me with a sympathetic been-there-done-that tone. She commented on how well behaved the kids were and told me I must be a good mom. As she left she patted my shoulder, smiled, and said, "Bless you!" It was so refreshing to hear someone being supportive. I then ran into a favorite elderly couple from way back home who now live in the city. As she went to talk to the kids Camilla piped up and said, "I'm the big helper!" You can tell we get talked to a lot. Camilla knows just what to say. It made us both chuckle. Joseph proceeded to scream and throw an awesome tantrum as they rang my groceries threw and stuffed the cart. He wailed all the way to the doors and across the parking lot. It didn't even phase me, I'm so used to this. 

We came home, unloaded the van, fed the baby, had lunch and snacked away the afternoon. The kids spent most of it outside jumping on the trampoline and playing in the sandbox. It was nice. While Finley napped I got in a blog post and then before I knew it I had to get dinner going before soccer. The kiddos scarfed down their dinner and then we were off!

It is super fun watching the kids play soccer and seeing them improve. Tonight I felt so discouraged though after Hyrum proudly ran up and asked, "How was that!?" He had scored a goal, and I missed it because I was so busy watching Joseph run all over the place. This field is particularly close to a busy road and I have to keep a sharp eye on Joe the entire time! Thankfully Mr. Stannix was there to help for a while. Near the end Joseph thought it was hilarious to run away despite my pleas for him to stay close. Daddy had to leave for Young Men's since he was the only councilor there tonight. Which left me bouncing a crying baby and shuffling Joseph back to our spot with my legs as he giggled and flopped around on the grass. Finally he sat on my foot and hugged my leg begging for a ride. I laughed out of frustration and lugged him back to the stroller on my leg while trying to get Finley to sleep in my arms. Just as I got the baby to sleep, Joseph decided to make a run toward the road again. I plopped Finley in Camilla's willing arms and dashed across the field to grab Joseph. We had five minutes left, but I had had it. I belted him into the stroller and walked the short distance to the van to drop him off kicking and screaming. By the time I made it back to grab the chair, Hyrum had finished and happily ran off the field to meet me. "I scored FOUR goals tonight, Mom!" he excitedly told me. I high fived him and acted as excited as I could, telling him how awesome he played (even though I maybe only caught two minutes). 

Joseph had cried himself to sleep by the time we pulled into the garage. I carried him in the house only to have him swiftly wake up when the word "jelly beans" was mentioned. Everyone went to bed pretty well and I was really looking forward to having a quiet night. It wasn't long before Finley woke up and needed to be snuggled back to sleep. Shortly after that Joe woke and screamed for the next hour and a half. As I bopped between bedrooms and boys. Mr. Stannix arrived home in time to save my sanity with a slushie. He helped with Joseph while I nursed Finley in the rocker, sipped my slush, and cried. I was so frustrated. I spent the rest of the night trying to console Joseph and the last half of my slushie spent the night melting on Camilla's window sill. We finally determined that Joe had an ear ache and I succumbed to spending the night downstairs watching Treehouse in hopes of distracting him from the pain and getting some sleep. It worked, mostly, but it was still a rough night. 

I know this is only a particular season in my life. I know that one day I will have time to do the things I once loved. I adore my children and feel privileged to be their mamma, to comfort them and wipe away their tears and play away these days of imagination and happiness. People tell me all the time, "this too shall pass" but sometimes it just doesn't sooth the frustration or sadness of a particular moment. I like to write about the crazy, real life stuff every now and then because I know that while I will miss all of the amazing things and the awesome milestones, I will also miss this. I will miss the monotony of it all. I will miss dressing kids, brushing teeth, doing dishes, sleepless nights, kissing owies, and having someone to care for constantly. Because I know that, it makes it a little easier to relish this season in life, even though it is trying and difficult some times, it is beautiful and amazing. I am so grateful for each of my children and the things they are teaching me each day.

Five for Finley

 Finley is FIVE months old today. I can hardly believe it! These past few weeks have been filled with lots of late night snuggles as he is cutting his first tooth. It is so wonderful to be able to snuggle him close and comfort him. A few times this week my eyes have been filled with tears of gratitude as he nestles into my shoulder and I kiss the top of his fuzzy head. I thank Heavenly Father daily for my healthy, happy baby. 

He has started eating rice cereal already. I watched him smack his lips together for a week and show interest in our food at the table and thought it was time. This is the first time I've made my own rice cereal and I love it! I love knowing exactly what he's getting, not to mention it's pretty cost effective. I'm excited to move into purees and flavors! The kids get so excited when it's time to feed him and ask a million times if they can do it, even Joseph wants to help. It's great having such big helpers. Our chunky little guy is well loved for sure! 

Finley is such a happy little guy, always smiling! He always has his tongue stuck out feeling that new tooth. Lately he is always screeching happily away while jumping in the jolly jumper, or playing with his siblings. He also likes to compete for attention so if everyone else is talking loudly he will join right in with his happy screeching. He is pretty content to play on his own, and is never short on entertainment with three older siblings. He loves them to pieces and adores when they talk to him or bring him toys.

 He has started really exploring the world around him with his senses. His is constantly reaching, grabbing, touching, feeling and sticking things in his mouth. He loves to grab faces and hold fingers. I can't eat very well with him on my lap anymore because he is constantly trying to pull my plate off the table. He loves grabbing his feet and still loves sucking on his fingers.

While this stage is super fun and exciting, I have been missing those newborn snuggles lately! He seems so big to me and so little to everyone else! I am in love with his ever growing leg rolls and his double chin. He gets a lot of smoochin' and lovin' from me and everybody else. Joseph can finally say his name, so he is no longer "baby wee-wee" but "fwin-nee". We sure love our little guy!