Relief

This morning before he left for work, Mike walked into the kitchen and embraced me in the most heartfelt hug a girl could ask for. Listening to his work shoes as he makes he way to the door each morning always makes me smile. 

I've been stuck on auto-pilot for quite some time now. I didn't realize until this morning how much I was holding back and not letting myself feel. I've been hiding my emotions, putting on a brave face, and placing one foot in front of the other for days and days. 

Seeing the big red signs posted down main street "STOP! No Gathering!", "Keep two meters apart". It makes my heart heavy. All of the unknowns about school starting, the constant pressure from social media to have an opinion or feel bad about your own opinion. Do I keep the kids home in September, or do I let them go. There are just so many unknowns in the world right now. 

 

I've been consuming my time with housework, drowning my emotions in dishes and approaching life one day at a time. I've been forgetting to get lost in the moment and let my soul feel and enjoy and embrace. 

 

I spent most of my morning in the haskap patch, picking and letting the wind blow my hair all about. The cool morning breeze followed by the warmth of the sun on my face was refreshing. I enjoyed the company of my parents and lots of chubby toddler fingers to help pick (and eat, and dump the bucket).  Listening to the morning bird song and laughter of children playing in the yard was such a treat. 

 

As I walked back to the house in the sprinkling rain, I let out a sigh of contentment. I felt my heart healing and the familiar feeling of joy creeping back in. Today my soul found relief in the haskap patch. 

Sunday Snapshot

 "Mom, I've changed a lot. I don't pick my nose anymore AND I wash my hands with soap now. I'm getting pretty big...." -Finley

Being Productive

 Today we woke to gentle showers and cloudy skies. We had a nice, slow morning inside filled with baking and time together.

 

 Hyrum and Sawyer had a little snuggle on the livingroom floor. I love when the big kids enjoy time with the smaller ones.

 

I made up two batches of cookies to fill the freezer and the cookie jar. They get eaten hot out of the oven and there's never many left by the time I'm finished. Then I began cleaning the house from one end to the other. The bedrooms were tidied and vacuumed, desks dusted. 

 

In between cleaning I started another batch of sourdough bagels. I found a great recipe that is only 5-6 hours start to finish. The overnight sourdough recipes make me crazy. I spent the rest of the afternoon doing dishes.

 

The sun graced us with her presence around 3Pm. Birds began singing again and the door began opening and closing as the children made their way out to enjoy some fresh air!

 

Work and Play

 We began our morning with two huge pans of German Pankcakes. These are a favorite around here and I've recently had to double the recipe because everyone has seconds now. They are loaded with eggs, so I don't mind much. We sprinkle icing sugar and drizzle a bit of homemade syrup over them and they get eaten pretty quick!

After everyone was powered up for the day, we went out to finish working on the hill out back. It's been dirt for quite some time and I have dreams of green grass and a playground there in the future. We've been working hard at making sure the dirt is level and adding topsoil so that we can seed it. The big boys had fun taking turns on the tiller. It's good practise for them! 

When the heat of the afternoon caught up with us, Grampa brought out some ice cream sandwiches from DQ. The littles were pretty excited about it! Sawyers melted all over his lap and down to his elbows, so he ended up taking a good ol' country bath afterwards with a tub and the water hose. While he played in the water, the rest of us got back to work. Once he'd had enough I brought him in to dress him and then he hung out in the greenhouse while we watered and checked on things. He got lost in his own imagination, pushing around a toy car, making sound effects and ignoring everything around him. I love watching kids play!

  

 

Prairie Creek

 Today after church, we ate lunch and relaxed a little bit outside. A few of the littles wandered out to the greenhouse to visit with Grampa. Oliver's hair is getting so long and has a little curl to it now. Mixed with his hilarious personality, it's simply the best. Mid afternoon we decided to take a drive out to Prairie Creek to scope out some Summer camp sites and let the littles throw rocks in the water. It was a nice Sunday drive. We did run into a little bit of rain, but on our way back we were able to drive out of it. We stopped for a little while at the creek and let the kids take off their shoes and walk through the cool, clear water. Reese was along and loved being with everyone. We had rock skipping contests and most of the tiniest Stannix children simply enjoyed throwing stone after stone into the water. When it came time to leave some of the children were wetter than others. We had rolled up pant legs and shirtless boys. I forgot to bring an extra diaper for Sawyer who basically ended up sitting in the creek before we left. He drove home naked, in a very wet diaper and fell asleep after a few minutes on the road

On the way home Oliver got a little  bit frustrated with Finley always telling him things. "Fin! You don't hafta tell me! I already know everwyfing!" Finley took this as a challenge, "Oh yeah? Well what's five plus five then?" Grampa whispered in Ollie's ear and he shouted matter-of-factly, "Six." So Finley drilled him again, "Well, what's six plus six?....Grampa, this time don't help him." We all laughed. 

We got home past the dinner hour and I scrambled to whip up something quick for cranky, hungry children.

  

  

 

 

 

 

Have To

 Today we met up with a dear friend from our time in Edmonton. I was assigned to be her visiting teacher at church and we had littles all the same age. She always kindly invited us over for play dates and lunch and baked delicious treats. As our littles were boating and playing on the beach, we were able to have a nice visit together and catch up. She is battling cancer at the moment and is frustrated at how it keeps her from caring for her five young children the way she would like to. As I was telling her about how I am able to leave my children at home during this pandemic when I HAVE to go grocery shopping, she smiled and said, "Have to". I stumbled, "Well, I love grocery shopping, so I guess it's not a have to." She smiled. It wasn't until later in our conversation that she expressed how much she missed being able to go out and pick the groceries for her house and plan the meals. Then it clicked. My entire perspective changed after our afternoon together. As I've contemplated a lot of my "Have to's" they've been turned into "Get to's". Instead of grumbling that I have to make dinner, I think that it is a privilege to cook for my family. I get to be the one to wake up in the middle of the night and soothe a crying child. I get to wake up early and figure out breakfast. Life is so much more pleasant when we change our "Have to's" to "Get to's" and I am forever grateful to this dear friend for sharing her heart and reminding me of this!

Family Walks

Today we finally saw some sun! We spent much of our day outside and even managed a family walk in the evening with everyone. Of all of the things we could do with our littles, they always say that walking up and around the orchard as a family is one of their favorite things to do. I'm always amazed at how children only want simple things. They crave our time and our full attention. Family walks in the evening is one of the ways we accomplish this. Sometimes we have races from one side to the other where shoes fly off and laughter is heard. Other times Mike and I are able to sneak in a conversation while the littles walk ahead and play tag together. Evenings like this fill my heart with gratitude!

Back to Church

We got to attend church in our cuilding for the first time in over three months. I may have cried tears of gratitude during morning prayers as I thanked our Heavenly Father for the opportunity to gather and worship. While I cherish the Sunday's we have spent doing home church, it was wonderful to worship together with those we love and have missed in our ward family! Even though we couldn't sing the hymns, tears still stung my eyes as we prepared to take the sacrament. Everyone used hand sanitizer and masks and the bread was put into individual cups with a separate garbage for disposal. We were seated with an empty bench between each family to promote social distancing and dismissed by rows at the end of the meeting. It felt strange to have to go through all of that, but we are glad to be together again, even if we can't sing the hymns.

Happy Anniversary

Today Mike and I celebrate twelve years of marriage! We have grown and learned so much together over the years and we are closer now than we were when we started. I can honestly say that Mike is my very best friend and there is no one else I'd rather spend all of my time with. When we were engaged we worked on the same grass cutting crew day in and day out and loved it! We spend a lot of time with each other and prefer it that way. Tonight we celebrated with KFC, but our plans for canoeing were put on hold thanks to the rain. Instead, we lit a candle and sat at the table for a romantic evening dinner after the littles were tucked in. I am so grateful to be married to such a hard working, loyal, loving, patient man!

Beach Bums

The littles have been begging and begging to go to the beach again and convinced me that today would be the perfect day! We woke to beautiful weather and they were all packed up and ready to go bright and early. I told them we had a few chores to finish up before we could leave and enlisted their help. They were happy to help because that meant that they could go to the beach sooner. We loaded up in big red and arrived at the lake in the late morning. There was not many people there, so it made for the perfect morning! Sawyer was so happy to be there and got so excited the closer we got to the beach. Having just gone swimming here a few days ago, he remembered how fun it was! This time we remembered his life jacket which allowed me to breath a little easier as I watched him play on the shoreline. The big kids all had fun on their floaties! I love this area of the beach because it is knee deep for a long ways out and I don't have to worry much about the little guys falling off a drop and into the deep water. Eventually the pizza floaties ended up getting holes in them, so we packed up and headed home for lunch with Daddy! We all enjoyed popsicles, did a little yard work and checked out the growth in the greenhouse! The tomatoes have really taken off and are taller than Sawyer now. The thick stalks are incredible and we are so looking forward to our harvest this year!