It is finally starting to feel a little bit like Spring. For the last
few weeks we have woken to the sound of birds singing in our backyard.
This morning the combination of blue sky, first morning light, and birds
singing made me giddy for warmer weather to come. After waving the big
kids off to school I had a huge desire to start Spring cleaning. I tore
apart the windows in the upstairs bedrooms, caked with dirt and grime,
and washed them in the tub. The crisp morning air was refreshing! The
boys played at my feet, wrestled on the toddler bed, and giggled away
while I scrubbed the gunk out of the window sills. It's a simple thing
that only I will notice, but it felt so good to see them all nice and
white again when I put them back together. Once we were all finally
dressed and ready for the day, we went out for a walk! Beautiful weather
like this must not be wasted inside.
Lately balance
has been a huge struggle for me. Our house always feels like a disaster
and there is endless spills and messes to clean up. It's always hard to
decided between work and play. If work wins, I feel guilty for not
playing, and if play wins, then not enough work gets done. There is a
continual pile of laundry to be folded on my downstairs couch, and the
sink is rarely empty of dirty dishes. Just a few weeks ago somebody
spilled their hot chocolate after complaining about how little they got
compared to everyone else. The cup was too close to the edge and it
truly was an accident. I had to swallow my anger over being called names
and remind myself to have a gentle touch as I went over to said child
and asked if he was okay. Then I looked at the floor and what I thought
was an empty cup was not. I totally had to bite my lip as I mopped up
the puddle of sticky hot chocolate and throw out the mug with the busted
handle. I then took a deep breath and excused myself to my room.
Sometimes all of the frustrating parts of a day build and build and when
they finally climax ya just need a good cry. My dear boy found me
tucked under the covers in my room, told me he loved me and apologized
for spilling. I wasn't even really upset about that, just everything. He
brought me his eye-spy book to cheer me up and asked if we could do it
together. So, instead of starting dinner, we snuggled on my bed with our
backs against the tear stained pillow finishing page after page of the
book.
Motherhood teaches so much about forgiveness,
patience, and understanding. I feel so blessed to have all of these
littles in our home to help me learn more about myself. I've been
jotting down these little things over the past month just so I never
forget the way things are right now. The kids are growing up so fast!
The older two spend more time away from home than at home and it's so
hard for me! I am trying to make the time we spend together count and
make sure that their needs and concerns are met. The little guys are so
busy that most days feel like a blur. Sometimes it does me good to slow
down and pray to see the world through their eyes.
Camilla
is so grown up lately. Her sense of humor is hilarious and she is super
witty! Sometimes she has a hard time with all of these brothers of hers
and often asks for special girl time, or extra chats. She has kept her
room clean for practically an entire year and has a nice little routine.
She pre-dates all of her journal pages and makes sure to only write one
page each night. She is ultra organized and often reminding us of when
she needs rides to activities and where the meeting spot is for pick up.
A few weeks ago she and Hyrum left for school without their fundraising
forms (which were due that day). I quickly loaded the boys and headed
to the school to drop them off. Just as I had parked my phone rang, it
was Camilla, to remind me that the forms were due today and ask if I
could drop them off. I told her Joe was just on his way to the office
with them and she ran and met him there. She is always on top of
everything and I love it! I never have to worry about her forgetting to
do anything. She has just started gymnastics once a week and absolutely
loves it! Her size and athletic abilities are definitely in her favor.
My favorite thing about her growing up right now is when she hops up on
the counter top at days end and chats my ear off over a bowl of ice
cream. She is so great to be around!
Hyrum is our quiet
boy. His mind is always scheming and dreaming. He often forgets school
stuff, but still does incredibly well on the things he does remember to
do. The other day he came home and excitedly told me that he had won the
innovation challenge. He built a very geometric structure from straws,
pipe cleaners, paper plate and pieces of clay. It was the tallest in his
class and didn't fall over when tipped or shaken. He was super excited!
I just smiled
that's my Hyrum. He loves to draw art filled with
shapes and designs and it's often very balanced on either side. His
newest love is a hand-me-down skate board and he spends every afternoon
riding it in the driveway.
Joseph is looking older
these days! He is tall, and charasmatic, and goofy. My very favorite
thing about Joe is the freckles that dust his nose and the twinkle in
his eye when he smiles. He is the kind of kid that needs to be busy and
active. When he starts complaining or teasing someone, he gets a job.
His favorite thing to do is wash the walls. I love the way he describes
things. One day he told me that something felt "scrubby" and another day
that something felt like "dry cleaning". He is one of a kind and
certainly knows how to push my buttons. At bedtime he always farts in
his bed right before I lie with him to ask him about his day. Often he
will knock on the wall after I've tucked him in just to make the dog
bark, which makes me furious because the baby is often asleep an hour
earlier. He thinks it's hilarious and I smile at his quiet giggle as I
yell from the livingroom that it's time to settle down. He and Hyrum are
sharing a room in the basement now and he loves feeling grown up and
having his big brother around. He loves making new friends, and seeks to
please others. This is a good thing, and a bad thing sometimes. There
has been moments of mooning at the park to get a laugh. The other day we
took the kids to an indoor play place and he spent the entire time
running around with a boy he just met. Making new friends is his very
favorite thing.
Finley is adorable, and strong willed,
and full of spunk these days. I wish I could record him all day long
because the things he says are hilarious. Maybe not so much the things
he says, but the way he says them. He often asks for "toast and dam" for
breakfast. He never says "yeah" or "yup", it's always "yes" with the
sweetest little "S" sound at the end. I love his random "I love you's"
when he notices I'm frazzled or having a hard day. He is the biggest
tease and gets great joy out of bugging his older siblings...and the
dog. Often I find myself shouting "FI---Joe--FINN! Stop teasing the
puppy!" Sometimes at the dinner table he will look across at Joe and say
"Are you stinkin' what I'm stinkin'?" He means "are you thinkin' what
I'm thinkin'?" but it's turned into quite a funny thing with the older
siblings. He pronounces Oliver's name "aw-viv-er" and it melts my heart.
He loves the word "super" and often uses to it to describe things. "I
super wuv smoodies!" or "I just wuv dees jammies super much!" He is at
the tricky age where he could still nap, but doesn't always need to.
Often he crashes late afternoon on the couch or in a corner somewhere.
And somehow after everyone else has been tucked in and fallen asleep, he
manages to sneak downstairs and enjoy some special mommy and daddy
time. We let him stay up with us because he won't be little forever, and
as a fourth child it's not often you get one and one with your parents.
He shares our snacks and kisses our cheeks and tells us he "wuvs" us.
Then he falls asleep next to me on the couch and Daddy carries him to
bed.
Oliver is such a little man now! He is looking so
grown up and I am cherishing his whispy blonde hair because I know it
won't last forever. He loves hard, as in, he loves to run across a room
and crash into you for a hug. I love the way he hooks his arms around my
neck and kisses me with his wet lips. My mornings often begin when
Ollie knocks on his door and says "mom...moooooommm...mum!" repeatedly
until I let him out. Daddy is one of his very favorite people in this
house and he always looks for him first thing in the morning and
screeches with glee when he gets home after work. His favorite thing to
do right now is rearrange my kitchen chairs. He is constantly pushing
chairs up to the counters and climbing right up. The other day I came
upstairs to find him crawling around my freshly wiped counter tops. He
had emptied half of my hand soap and swirled it around the counters with
my scrub brush. He had the hugest grin on his face and was NOT happy
when I took him down. He is quite the dare devil and loves to balance on
the arms of our couches and try to jump from the highest parts of the
parks. He has graduated from his old open-close handed wave to waving
his whole arm back and forth. His whole body practically shakes as he
waves good-bye with his crazy eyes and open mouth. He's such a riot! Now
that the weather is warmer he is always wanting to be outside and often
cries or gets upset if I sit down on the couch instead of putting on
his shoes. He has mastered his bum-drops on the trampoline and is
learning to stay away from the edges. He loves playing with "reese" and
says her name so well.
We are loving the warmer
weather this week and the way that the sunshine is warming our souls. I
feel like the change in seasons has given me a new energy and
appreciation for things. It's so refreshing. One of my favorite times of
day right now is when I get to tuck in the little boys. Fin will often
ask me to lay with him and rub his back. Almost every night without fail
the Geese fly over just as he's falling asleep. It's such a fun thing
to listen to while we are snuggled in that dimly lit bedroom. Life is
busy and full right now, but we sure love it!