In the Moment

Every time we bring home a newborn, life is kind of a sleepless blurr for a little while. Each morning as I look in the mirror I take note of the dark circles under my eyes as they increase in size. We've had some rough nights, and some early mornings this week and it takes all of my strength to wake up and get organized in the morning. I wave Camilla off to school with my pj's and bed head and I practically have to hold my eye lids open just to see. 

I didn't have a lot of energy today and decided to take some extra time to just sit on the couch and snuggle my growing babe!

When the afternoon rolled around and the sun had warmed things up a bit I snuggled Oliver up in the wrap and ventured out to the park with the boys. As I watched them play I wished I could freeze time. They looked older. It was like they had grown up just a little overnight. I enjoyed taking the time to snap a few pictures and to gaze upon their sweet faces.

We hit up the mail box on the way home. It was a good mail day. I had ordered some new cloth diapers at the beginning of the week and was surprised to see them in our mail box so quickly! With two in diapers I had to replenish my stash. After looking at the pile of disposables that accumulate on Oliver's floor after just one day, I am looking forward to using these! I love me a cloth diapered baby tush!

 The older boys went back to the park for the rest of the afternoon. I nursed Ollie on my bed as the cool Autumn air poured through my windows and the laughter from the park echoed in my room. I watched the children play out the window from my bed, and admired Finley's chubby toes as he hid behind the curtains giggling, "Whay is Win-wee?..... Der he is!!"

 I can't believe how fast this boy is growing! He's pretty much out of his newborn sleepers and into 0-3 month. I can tell he's stretching out already because he has to curl his legs up a bit to lie on my lap now. The kids love that he is awake a little bit more and always try to get a smile out of him! He's peed on me more times than I care to admit today. You'd think after three boys I'd learn a trick or two, but it's always a surprise! Hyrum laughed hysterically while I squealed in surprise and tried to contain it. Never a dull moment!

The boys came home for an after school snack and then headed back to the park with Camilla until Dinner. I sat at the kitchen table as they shuffled in from the park. As the door closed with a SLAM my spice jars rattled on top of the stove. Slamming doors happens a lot around here... And though it drives me nutts right now, I'm sure it's a sound I will miss one day.

Autumn Crafting

I am desperately trying to get back into routine, but trying to be kind to myself at the same time. I tackled the grocery store this morning with all of the boys and it went quite well. This adjustment to five has been one of the easiest because, after four, what's one more? There are still some things that are hard though, so we are taking our weeks one day at a time. 

After our busy morning, my heart melted when I came downstairs to find Finners snoozing on the couch in his overalls. I stopped for a few minutes to admire his chubby toddler toes, his arm tucked behind his head, his long dark lashes and his wispy blonde hair. Moments like these fill my mother heart to the brim and remind me why I dreamed of being a mother my whole childhood. 

With two of the four boys napping, I decided to whip up a quick craft for the big boys. With all of the time I spend sitting and feeding Oliver during the day, I sometimes feel guilty for not being able to spend more time with these cute boys. 

Pinterest came to the rescue with these cute little handprint, Fall trees. The boys had fun cutting and gluing, and even though the kitchen was still a mess when we had finished, I felt a lot better about things.

Soon, I heard Ollie squeaking and stretching over the monitor and I had to put everything else on hold.

Eat, sleep, repeat. 

That's pretty much how life is going these days....

Saturday Snuggles

International Balloon Festival

Tonight we took the littles to the International Balloon Festival in High River. When I searched free events a few months back I came across it and hoped that baby would come early enough that we'd be able to go! I have a love for hot air balloons, and the night didn't disappoint! We swung into the city in the late afternoon to pick up Daddy from work so we could drive together. We arrived early enough to get second row "seats". The field was empty when we got there, but as soon as they started blowing up the balloons the children were mesmerized. They sat in the very front on the grass, out of ear shot, and I admired their excited expressions as they chatted amongst themselves. I chuckled at the small size of the basket as each team unrolled and inflated their balloon. When dusk fell upon us, the excitement picked up even more as the balloons began to glow. It was SO COOL to see them up that close! It's really hard to fathom their actual size when you see them floating in the vast skies above. When they announced that they would soon be taking down the barrier so that we could walk into the field and check them out up close, I about died of happiness. Taking a hot air balloon ride is on my bucket list. One day...

As the night grew late, and the cool Fall air settled upon us, we maneuvered our way through the huge crowd of people and headed for home. Until next year....

Almost There

Today was tough. Real tough. I went to bed last night anticipating how busy today was going to be and when morning came, I didn't want to get out of bed. Oliver woke up to feed around 5:00am and I stumbled back to bed in the stillness of the morning with a quiet plea that my children would sleep until 7:00am. It worked! I put on my best smile when the little boys came to my bedside, and we all tip-toed into the kitchen for breakfast. Porridge was on the menu to warm and fill those little bellies on a chilly Autumn morning. After we ate there was a mad rush to get everyone dressed and ready, including the baby, so that we could leave shortly after Camilla and make it to our two week check-up with the midwife. Poor Mr. Stannix had to dry my tears before he even left for work this morning. I'm pretty sure I had cried all my make-up off just a few short minutes after I put it on.

I woke Ollie after sending Camilla out to her bus and gave him a quick bath to freshen him up (which he wasn't too happy about). As I was drying him off, Joseph came up with a problem that needed solving. I turned around to talk him through it and suddenly felt my feet get warm. Sure enough, Oliver peed all over the floor and managed to hit my shirt and jeans. Since they were the only clean clothes I had, and we were kind of in a hurry, I may or may not have changed. I mopped up the puddle, dressed the baby, and fed the baby while the boys got in the car. With a whole minute to spare I buckled Oliver into his carseat. As I went to take Finley out to the van I realized he had a dirty diaper and let out a giant sigh as I quickly changed him. Just as I went out the door, Hyrum came in and headed to the bathroom while my pleas to hurry followed him up the stairway. As we drove down the highway the gas light came on. We were already going to be pretty much late, so I stopped in the next town for gas. I'm not sure how we did it, but we still made it on time for our appointment even after all of the set backs. I suppose that's why I always plan to leave twenty minutes sooner than I need to. 

Turns out the midwife was running a little behind and we had to wait anyway! The boys were thankfully agreeable and everything went well. When she first set Oliver on the scale he was weighing in at just over 6lbs (down a whole pound from his birth weight). We were both confused, since he eats like a champ and I have an abundance of milk right now. She went and grabbed her own scale and sure enough, he weighed a nice 8lbs 6oz. He is healthy, happy, and doing great! 

We got home just in time for the boys to scarf down a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then I dropped them at a friends while I went to the dentist. I chipped a tooth (while flossing of all things) the first night we brought Oliver home and needed to get it checked out. I left the dentist with a frozen mouth, three new fillings, and another appointment booked. I have avoided dental work for a long time now, and it needs to be done! 

I spent the afternoon tidying here and there, throwing laundry through the wash, wishing I didn't eat my last chocolate bar yesterday, and trying not to fall asleep (so tired)! My sister came in the late afternoon and did some newborn photos for me. I got to peek at a few and I am so excited to see the rest! 

Mr. Stannix, being the thoughtful guy that he is, brought me home a beautiful bouquet of flowers to cheer me up. He always knows what I need! 

When I tucked in Joseph he asked me to lie with him, like he does each night. When I finished rubbing his back he rolled over on his pillow and gave me a big, wet smooch on the cheek. There is nothing better than spontaneous kisses from my favorite preschooler! Then he melted my heart even more when he whispered, "I'm gunna listen to you mom. I want to make you SO happy." I'd love to know what that kid thinks about as he falls asleep each night. 

I am so looking forward to tomorrow. It's been a long week!

Quiet on the Homefront

 These days are slow, and I am soaking up every ounce of it. We are making it through with lots of deep breaths and trying not to go crazy over the mountain of laundry on my couch or the dishes on my counter. We enjoyed a nice, relaxing, quiet day today with no obligations, no where to go, and no expectations. 

When we wake in the morning the house is a tad on the chilly side. It's not quite cold enough to turn on the furnace, but Fall is definitely in the air! I love enjoying the cozy atmosphere in our home as we layer up in sweaters and blankets and admire the trees changing colors across the park. 

Finley is eager to help with Oliver and brings me handfuls and handfuls of diapers while I change him. Eventually the entire bag ended up in a pile on my rocking chair, and I just had to shrug.

In the late afternoon I escaped to catch a few winks in the rocking chair while I nursed Oliver and the boys played contently. Joseph fell asleep on the couch, Finley found a favorite toy, and Hyrum sat at the table with some freshly made playdough. I listened to the rain pound on the rooftop and the thunder grumble in the distance as I soaked in the quietness of the nursery.

When Camilla got home from school she grabbed a quick snack and then rushed off to the park with her little brothers. The crisp Fall air nipped at their noses as they ran and played with friends. I watched them chase each other all around the green space playing frozen tag and was brought back to my childhood. I remembered the way the cool Fall air would feel on my cheeks, warmed from playing tag with the neighbors. They came inside for dinner with drippy, pink noses and grins from ear to ear. 

Dinner was graciously brought by a friend, and it was so nice not to have to worry about what to cook. When we finished eating, Finley went for a bath and then we had ice cream. When I asked Joe what kind he wanted tonight I had  to laugh at his reasoning, "I had banilla yesterday, so today I will have chocolate please."

I then did bedtime solo for the first time since Oliver joined our family. I started with the toddler who proved to be the most difficult. I watched from the cracked doorway as he stood on his bed and high-fived his shadow approximately 100 times before he actually lied down. He then rolled all over his bed, kissed his headboard a few times, jumped in and out, and eventually fell asleep with his legs hanging off the edge.

Surviving with Five

Today is my first day all on my own. I woke up with no expectations for my day. I was going to take it easy and slow and let things happen (or not happen). In a lot of ways adjusting to five has been pretty easy. Oliver sleeps a lot during the day and I should be able to get lots done, but sometimes the thought of doing anything except for snuggle that little babe seems super overwhelming right now.  People keep telling me it's just like normal, that I can still do all of the same things I did before and my routine can carry on. But sometimes that just makes me want to cry because all I want to do is soak up as much of him as I can while he's a newborn. I'm grateful for good friends who reassure me that it's okay to sit on my bum and drink in this newborn for just a little while longer yet!

While we rocked and snuggled I decided that...

It's okay to sit and leave the mess and snuggle your newborn.

It's okay to feel overwhelmed, to cry, to give up on routine for just a little while.

It's okay to let the baskets of clean laundry sit unfolded until the couch is piled high.

It's okay to let your kids raid the cookie jar all day or have scrambled eggs for dinner.

It's okay if you can't shower or pull yourself together  for a little while in the mornings, even when your shirt is constantly drenched in milk and baby spit up.

 It's okay to ask for help.

It's okay to ask for forgiveness when your emotions get the best of you.

It's okay if you don't have it all together.

It's okay to rock and nurse that baby in a quiet room while trying not to worry about what the toddler is up to.

It's okay to turn on a favorite TV show for a little longer than usual to occupy those busy boys.

This is what I told myself, and will tell myself for the rest of the week.

 

Be kind to yourself.

Take time for you.

To all of you new mamma's out there, that little baby is going to grow so so fast. Cherish that tiny one while you can. The rest can wait.

(Ollie's first Sunday)

Homecoming

 Since we got home from the hospital pretty early in the morning, all of the littles were still in their jammies! They were so excited when we brought in the baby and quickly crowded around to "oOo" and "Aww" over how cute he was. 

Camilla was the first to exclaim, "Aw! He's so little! And so cute!" We got over the fact that he was a boy pretty quick! She's baby crazy like her mamma. Then they all fought over who would hold him first. We decided to go oldest to youngest.

 My sis snapped our first picture as a family of SEVEN!

 Huge thanks to Auntie Emma for holding down the fort!!

 My parents were able to come down for the weekend and we were so glad to have them! 

 Oliver enjoyed the extra cuddles!

 And one last shot of this girl. I can't help but think she must be pretty special to have FOUR little brothers. I love the way she nurtures and loves them! They're pretty lucky to have her!

When Grandma Comes

 My Mom was up for a few days this week to help me out. She cuddled mister Oliver late at night so that I could get some sleep, mopped my floors, washed my walls, and helped with meals. After being cooped up at home all week I decided the boys and I needed an outing. Once Oliver woke from his morning snooze we headed to a nearby park to enjoy the leaves and get some fresh air. It was extra helpful having Gramma there to catch Finley on the slide and push Joe on the swings. I am very grateful to that mother of mine for instilling in me a desire to be a mother. She has taught me all that I know, and I admire the way she selflessly serves!

One Week