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Monday, September 19, 2016

Surviving with Five

Today is my first day all on my own. I woke up with no expectations for my day. I was going to take it easy and slow and let things happen (or not happen). In a lot of ways adjusting to five has been pretty easy. Oliver sleeps a lot during the day and I should be able to get lots done, but sometimes the thought of doing anything except for snuggle that little babe seems super overwhelming right now.  People keep telling me it's just like normal, that I can still do all of the same things I did before and my routine can carry on. But sometimes that just makes me want to cry because all I want to do is soak up as much of him as I can while he's a newborn. I'm grateful for good friends who reassure me that it's okay to sit on my bum and drink in this newborn for just a little while longer yet!

While we rocked and snuggled I decided that...

It's okay to sit and leave the mess and snuggle your newborn.
It's okay to feel overwhelmed, to cry, to give up on routine for just a little while.
It's okay to let the baskets of clean laundry sit unfolded until the couch is piled high.
It's okay to let your kids raid the cookie jar all day or have scrambled eggs for dinner.
It's okay if you can't shower or pull yourself together  for a little while in the mornings, even when your shirt is constantly drenched in milk and baby spit up.
 It's okay to ask for help.
It's okay to ask for forgiveness when your emotions get the best of you.
It's okay if you don't have it all together.
It's okay to rock and nurse that baby in a quiet room while trying not to worry about what the toddler is up to.
It's okay to turn on a favorite TV show for a little longer than usual to occupy those busy boys.

This is what I told myself, and will tell myself for the rest of the week.
 
Be kind to yourself.
Take time for you.

To all of you new mamma's out there, that little baby is going to grow so so fast. Cherish that tiny one while you can. The rest can wait.

(Ollie's first Sunday)

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Homecoming

 Since we got home from the hospital pretty early in the morning, all of the littles were still in their jammies! They were so excited when we brought in the baby and quickly crowded around to "oOo" and "Aww" over how cute he was. 

Camilla was the first to exclaim, "Aw! He's so little! And so cute!" We got over the fact that he was a boy pretty quick! She's baby crazy like her mamma. Then they all fought over who would hold him first. We decided to go oldest to youngest.




 My sis snapped our first picture as a family of SEVEN!

 Huge thanks to Auntie Emma for holding down the fort!!

 My parents were able to come down for the weekend and we were so glad to have them! 

 Oliver enjoyed the extra cuddles!

 And one last shot of this girl. I can't help but think she must be pretty special to have FOUR little brothers. I love the way she nurtures and loves them! They're pretty lucky to have her!

Saturday, September 17, 2016

When Grandma Comes

 My Mom was up for a few days this week to help me out. She cuddled mister Oliver late at night so that I could get some sleep, mopped my floors, washed my walls, and helped with meals. After being cooped up at home all week I decided the boys and I needed an outing. Once Oliver woke from his morning snooze we headed to a nearby park to enjoy the leaves and get some fresh air. It was extra helpful having Gramma there to catch Finley on the slide and push Joe on the swings. I am very grateful to that mother of mine for instilling in me a desire to be a mother. She has taught me all that I know, and I admire the way she selflessly serves!








Friday, September 16, 2016

One Week

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Oliver's Birth Story

I am not entirely sure where this birth story starts. This baby was a tease and I contracted on and off all week. I would sleep lightly at night through waves of light contractions, hoping something would happen soon! On Thursday evening I had some pretty regular contractions but they petered out during the night. The next morning I went for a nice long walk with the boys on the bike and Finley in the stroller. I had finally finished everything I needed to get done before baby came, and tried to relax and enjoy the day. Everyone was pretty tired when we got back. After a quick lunch I tucked Finley in for a nap and then snuggled into my big bed with the other two boys. We all had a nice, long 2 1/2 hour nap! I didn't know how needed and inspired the nap was until later that night.

When we woke up we went and met up with some friends at the park. While pushing Joe on the swing, I got a few good contractions. When we got home the kids ate a snack and I started recording the time between contractions. They were 7-10 minutes apart and strong enough to make walking difficult. I smiled to myself as I thought about how our babies always come on weekends! I went ahead and made dinner while the kids played downstairs. When Mike got home I showed him my sheet of paper where I had been recording contractions and he went to work loading the carseat and hospital bag. He really didn't want to have a baby on our long drive into the hospital. We scarfed down our dinner and called a friend to stay with the kids while my sister made her way to our house. Mike gave me a blessing of comfort and strength before we left. As I said good-bye I felt surprisingly calm and ready.

We purposely decided to head to the hospital nice and early since it's a 45 minute drive. We anticipated spending the evening walking around the mall waiting for things to pick up. When we got to the mall my contractions were five minutes apart and we decided to keep driving towards the hospital. We stopped at a store to pick up some snacks and I gave a quick call to my midwife to update her. My contractions were 4-5 minutes apart, lasting one minute. She told me she would call her backup and meet us at the hospital as soon as she could. We slowly made our way over there to be admitted. I was feeling nauseous, cold, and shaky and hoped this meant things would be quick.

My last labor was hard for me mentally. After a stillbirth I was worried about the complications. I knew what to expect and was scared of the pain. This time I was determined to be more mentally zoned in on my body and what was happening.

We arrived at the hospital around 8:30pm and I calmly walked up to the labor unit where we met up with Hayley and Kim (my awesome mother-daughter midwife team). We got a nice, quiet room with dimmed lights. I got changed, walked, swayed, leaned on the bed. Around 9:30 I had to breath pretty good through contractions. I closed my eyes with each one and let it wash over me. My midwife reminded me to relax my shoulders and let the contractions work. I braced myself against the wall for each one while Mike pushed hard on my lower back to ease the back labor I always get. I was reminded of Hyrum's birth and the way Mike and I worked together through the labor. Knowing he was by my side made me feel safe. I zoned out from everything going on around me. Kim placed a hot pack on my back and I concentrated on the relief from the heat. I closed my eyes and practiced my breathing while Mike and my midwife team quietly talked in the background between contractions. When he noticed me contracting he would rush to my side and help where he could. We made a good team!

Things got intense pretty quick and I could feel my body doing what it was supposed to do. My water broke all on it's own, and the adrenaline quickly followed. Hayley and Kim helped me into the bed. It felt familiar. This was where I birthed all of my babies. It was what I knew.

When it came time to push there was no blaring lights, no doctor taking off the bottom of the bed to catch the baby. It was calm and peaceful and just what I wanted.

Mike bet that baby would arrive around 11:30. We've done this a few times and he knows how my body works. I pushed for 15-20 minutes. Every time I started saying I couldn't do it anymore, my midwives would stop me with a quick, "Yes, you can! You're doing great!" Hearing that this baby had some hair peeked my curiosity and sped up my desire to meet him or her soon. I closed my eyes and concentrated hard on what my body needed to do. I prayed for strength and kept breathing to stay calm. Before I knew it Daddy had caught the baby and we were hearing the first cries. Daddy was brave and wonderful and it was so great to have him by my side. Baby was immediately placed on my chest and a warmed blanket cozied around us.

Since no one had declared the gender, I had to ask. "It's a boy!" declared Daddy. I totally thought he was joking. I whole heartedly believed that this babe was going to be a girl. I had to check for myself, because I really didn't believe Mike! After checking, the first words out of my mouth were, "Camilla is going to kill me!" The poor girl was really rooting for a little sister.

He was so beautiful, and of course I fell in love with his squishy little body right away.  My favorite part about birthing with a midwife is the time and stillness they give you to enjoy the new babe. He wasn't being whisked away to be weighed and measured. They let us cuddle until the cord stopped pulsing and then Daddy did the honors and cut the cord. The room was quiet and peaceful.

He had his first big poop and a pee while he nursed. Hayley cleaned him up for me, and then passed him over to Daddy for a snuggle. They didn't even weigh and measure him until after I had showered and changed. He was 7lbs 15oz and 21" long.

I knew that we could go home as soon as we wanted, but given how tired I was, and the fact that it was close to 3:00am before we were all settled in under fresh blankets, I opted to stay for a while and sleep. The hospital staff kindly agreed, on the condition that they wouldn't have to come in and check us (which was perfect, because then I could sleep!) I dozed on and off, nursed when Ollie needed it, and admired him in the dimly lit hospital room. I loved the way he slept with his hands curled up around his face. I oogled over the peach fuzz on his cheeks. I admired the way his long wisps of dark, smooth hair tickled his neck, and stared into his bright eyes as he looked at his new world.

Shortly after 6:00am a nurse quietly knocked at the door and informed us that they had a few ladies coming in to the hospital and really needed the room. I woke Mike and we dressed Oliver into some warm clothes for the car ride home.

We drove into the sunrise and watched the pink sky change to orange and then blue. We stopped for a quick breakfast and ate in the van in silence before coming home to excited siblings, eagerly awaiting to find out if they had a new baby brother or sister.

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Visting the Midwife

At the beginning of this pregnancy I was crossing my fingers in hopes of getting a midwife again here in the city. I almost jumped for joy when I received a phone call one evening from my midwife team telling me they had accepted my application. Having the kind of care they give is such a blessing.

They were able to come for home visits on day one and three after Ollie was born, and today we ventured in to the clinic for our five day check-up. Little man is still right around his birth weight and doing so well! 

My Grandparents happened to be down this way visiting Gramma's sister and stopped by in the afternoon to meet Oliver on their way home. I say this every time we have a baby, but I feel so blessed that our kids get to have Great-Grandparents in their lives! It's so special.

My Gramma is a lady of grace, and I admire her so much! She has pretty much lost her sight, but still lives life to it's fullest. She enjoyed the baby snuggles and touching his soft baby skin.

Then mister Ollie slept away the rest of the afternoon!

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

The Corn Bus-T

We are still lucky enough to have Daddy around for a few more days. The "third day blues" hit today in full force and I spent a lot of time rocking my babe in the rocking chair and mentally adjusting to life with FIVE. It felt good to move around the house throughout the day and spend time with the littles.

While I was in the kitchen this afternoon I caught Finley out of the corner of my eye. He was playing with his shadow, stepping forward and back and smiling as his shadow grew and shrunk. I was so glad I got to witness that little moment of discovery! Each time I bring home a new baby it always amazes me how much my toddler grows! The first time I changed his bum he seemed like a giant compared to his new little brother. I picked him up today, unprepared for how much he weighed! A few days ago he was light and easy, and now I almost have to grunt as I lift him for a snuggle. His hands are suddenly big and chubby. He navigates the stairs independently without a wall or railing. It's crazy how fast these little people grow!


Tonight we took the littles to our Ward Corn Bust. They were looking forward to it all afternoon! Joseph had a nap with the promise of going to the corn bust tonight and staying up late. Between tending to a crying baby and dishing everyone's plates I hardly had a second to sit down and eat, but I loved seeing the joy on my Children's faces as they met up with friends and enjoyed good food.


When we got home I sat down to feed the baby while Daddy wrestled everyone into jammies. I listened to Joe while he got dressed and ended up laughing so hard at his conversation with his Daddy. "You tricked me, Daddy," He said. "What do you mean Joe?" He continued his story, "You said we were going to a corn bus, but there was no bus!!" It was a great way to end the evening!

Monday, September 12, 2016

My Sidekick

I just wanted to take a few minutes and give a little shout out to my awesome side kick. He's taking some time off for me this week and has done a fabulous job keeping up with the house and entertaining the littles. My kitchen has never been cleaner, my counter tops sparkle, and he takes such pride in his work! I love the twinkle in his eyes as he serves me, cooks for me, and takes care of things.
 
He happily takes the baby throughout the day so that I can rest or get a few quick things done. Seeing him with a baby in his arms is a total heart melter for me! 

He is such a great Dad and I'm so glad he gets to be by my side through this parenting journey.

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Snuggle Time

 Baby Ollie and I enjoyed some quality snuggle time in my bed this morning while the rest of the family went off to church. I am so in love with this little man! More pictures and a birth story to come...

Saturday, September 10, 2016

Baby Ollie

Introducing...


Oliver William Stannix
Born Friday, September 9, 2016
11:54PM
7lbs 15oz, 21 inches long

We are all home and doing wonderful!