Where to Start

Life is kicking my butt lately. I'm having a hard time jumping on here to write. Hopefully someone out there can relate to the fact that I have had the same load of laundry sitting on my bed waiting to be folded for three days now. When bedtime rolls around I carefully place it on the floor and after I've made my bed in the morning, I put it back on my bed with the intention of folding it up. The bags under my eyes just keep getting bigger and blacker (I know that's not a word). Finley's hitting some milestones (sitting up, crawling, teething), I've had to change the sheets for a bed wetter a few times this week, and Joe always needs his sippy refilled at approximately 5:00am. Being so tired and emotionally drained has left me feeling quite lifeless on the best of days. I think I am also becoming a bit of a hermit. But here are a few gems that have helped me get through these past few weeks.

When Joseph finished eating one day he said, "Mom, my body's full." I responded, "Oh, your belly?" He quickly corrected me, "No, my BOOOODDDY."

Camilla's honesty always makes me chuckle. When I was tucking her in one night she said, "Your hair smells better than your breath."

While shopping at Superstore the kids found some sunglasses and begged me to buy them. I agreed and as we walked around the store Camilla put on her new glasses and stated, "There, now I won't get so distracted by all of these bright, beautiful dresses!" That girl is a shopper for sure!

And one day at snack time Camilla exclaimed, "Goldfish, granola bars AND water? This is going to be a scrumptious day!" 

Finley has pretty well mastered sitting! It's so fun to see him playing with the kids now. I think he likes his new angle on life.

FIFA World Cup

Last night the Mr. and I took in the FIFA World Cup with some friends. The boys had been out golfing in the afternoon so they just met us there. We had an awful time finding parking and by the time we did we got to walk to the game in the pouring rain while the sky rumbled above. Finley snuggled in close and fell asleep while the rain fell. Jessica and I avoided puddles only to be splashed by passing cars. Eventually we gave up on keeping our feet dry and trucked along down the sidewalk. We arrived at the stadium just as the rain started to let up. The game had been delayed because of lightening so we only missed the first four minutes. We were soggy, but still in good spirits!

I adore this guy. He is my best friend. It was so great to take in the game with him. 

The wave went around a few times and I caught part of it the second time. Hard to see in the picture. The energy was amazing! I've never heard people cheer so loud! Finley surprisingly slept through the first half despite the noise.

When he did finally wake up, he spent his time smiling at the group behind us and hanging out with Daddy. 

The game ended in a 0-0 tie, but it was still fun to watch and cheer. Soccer is a little more interesting in real life than it is on the TV.

Thanks for the fun night friends!

Hanging Out

The sprinkler, homemade popsicles (loaded with spinach), and a sunny day....

Necessities of Motherhood

Today I have been pondering a few of the necessities of motherhood.

Patience for the endless laundry, piles of dishes, crummy floors, and long tantrums.

Understanding for when the two year old helps himself to the bowl of grapes in the fridge and accidently spills them all over the kitchen.

A sense of humor for the little boy who excitedly jumps for joy with a full cup of juice in his hand at my compliance to let him pour his sisters juice.

Empathy to see the world through my children's eyes.

Sunday Snooze

So peaceful.

Soccer Tournament

 This weekend we watched our kids in their very first ever sports tournament. The location was great and there were tons of little people playing on all of the different fields. We started off our day watching Camilla play her little heart out.

She's come such a long way since her first day and I love her enthusiasm on the field. She is one of the smallest on her team, but well loved by her team mates. It was fun watching her warm up with a small group of friends she made on the team as they took turns trying to score on each other. It was a lot of fun! 

The boys were super well behaved while we watched! They are pretty used to soccer now and as long as they have a hill to play on or some green space to run they are more than happy. I love watching the two of them hang out and become closer friends.

Right after Camilla's game we walked across to the other field and watched Hyrum. They were pretty short players and had hardly any subs, so this guy ran the entire time.

It's been great watching him learn and grow! He scored a goal and told me it was for Camilla. He is absolutely the sweetest kid. Any time another player fell down on the field, Hyrum made sure to stop and help them up even if it meant missing out on the ball or a potential goal. 

Uncle Arland and Auntie Naomi joined us for the morning! The kids were sure happy to see them! Most of these pics are courtesy of Auntie Naomi who kindly stole my camera while I bounced Finley to sleep in the carrier. It was a great morning!

Busy Days

The days are flying by and my kids are growing before my eyes! The other morning at the park I watched Joseph navigate the playground, daring new heights and trying new things and it dawned on me how big he is getting! He hardly requires supervision and it's weird to just sit back and watch him climb and explore. He pretty much runs everywhere we go and loves every minute! When we pulled into the garage after our morning at the spray park I started dancing to a favorite song and from the back seat I heard Joseph go, "Mom, you CA-RAZY!" I laughed right out loud. His expressions these days crack me right up.

We are a month into soccer and I'm kind of dreading the last half. Three days a week is almost too much! Last night I stood on the sidelines keeping Finley happy in the carrier while enduring sass from a three year old who thought it was fun to pester his brother until he screamed. To top it all off, my flip flop broke.  Even though it's silly, I stood there with tears stinging my eyes wishing that soccer was over all ready! But then Camilla scored a goal, flashed me her proudest grin, and I remembered why I decided to do this in the first place. I love seeing my kids learning, gaining confidence, and enjoying the outdoors. 

I am looking forward to the Summer months where my calendar is mostly blank (aside from a few weekend weddings), and the days are care-free. It is during these days where we enjoy long afternoons exploring outdoors, playing in the sprinkler in the backyard, checking out our favorite parks, enjoying outdoor picnics, and devouring fresh garden goods.

Spring cleaning has almost come to a close. I just finished washing the windows this afternoon and I can't believe how much brighter the front room seems now. That was probably my biggest accomplishment today and I'm trying to be okay with that. Sometimes when I look around the house in the evening at the piles of dishes, the scattered markers and paper clippings on the kitchen table, and the floor dotted with toys, socks, and crumbs, I have a really hard time not feeling discouraged. My doctor called the other night with my blood test results and my thyroid is acting up again. Possible side effects include fatigue, brain fog, and depression. Every day I struggle to muster up the energy to fulfill my role as a mother with happiness and grace.

The day always seems to end in chaos as soon as dinner is finished. I shuffle the kids through baths, chase them into their jammies, make sure everyone pees, and coax them to brush their teeth and floss. There are moments where almost all of them are crying for my attention at once, wanting my help and then refusing it when I give it, and I'm sure I'm going to lose it on someone. But if I hold my breath for just a few minutes longer, we make it through family prayers, songs, and back rubs and before I know it the house is silent, and I breath a sigh of relief. If Mr. Stannix is home we hang out, if he's not I fold laundry on our bed as I watch the sun go down and do a quick tidy on the kitchen. Then, as I check on my sleeping babies I suddenly remember why I love them so much and all of the heartache from the day is forgotten.

Quiet Time

Early afternoons have become my favorite time of day. After lunch Joseph and Finley go down for their naps while I help the older two do some school at the kitchen table. We usually whisper or use quiet voices and while they are busy the house seems calm. I get Hyrum started on his printing and Camilla going on a math page and then I get the dishes whipped up and the floors swept. Finley is usually the first one to wake and enjoys a few minutes to himself on his play mat. Joseph follows soon after and heads right to the water cooler for a drink before making his way to me for a cuddle. Sometimes, it's Finley he cuddles up to upon waking up.

Still, Still, Still

Daddy has been out of town so the kids have been taking turns sleeping in my bed. 

Bed time has got to be one of my favorite things. 

Tonight I caught Joseph just as his arm twitched, signalling he had finally fallen asleep.

I love sneaking in and checking on them after they fall asleep. 

The house is so still.

I usually review our day together in my head and note where I could have done better, been more patient, or kept my thoughts to myself. 

But in that moment when I gaze on their little eye lashes resting on their cheeks, or their chubby hands resting on the covers, all of those hard times melt away.

Before leaving I removed his awesome super hero mask and kissed his sweaty brow.

Tomorrow is another day, and I am looking forward to a fresh start.

Gardening with the Littles

 We procrastinated on the gardening front big time this year. Our garden really only ever produces enough for us to snack on all summer (especially the yummy peas) but my Dad wisely councils, "At least you know how to do it! It's all about the experience."

 

I announced to the littles at breakfast that today would be a gardening day. There was cheers all around! I'm sure that will wear off in a few years, but for now I'll take it! We made our way out to the yard just as the sun started rounding the corner on the house, casting it's rays into the backyard. We picked out all the weeds and overturned the soil with a shovel. The kids liked breaking the clumps and finding worms. 

 I kind of let the kids take it from there, trying not to worry or control too much of the planting process. Camilla's peas may or may not be too close together, but they'll still grow! 

 This picture hardly does justice to how dirty Joseph actually was. He was working in his bare feet for part of the day and was black from head to toe by the end of it. You better believe he enjoyed a nice warm afternoon bath afterwards!

 Hyrum soaked up every bit of the experience. Gardening is so good for the soul and this kid has a quiet, pensive way about him. He didn't say too much, he just dug in his heels and went to work, but I could tell he was enjoying himself. When it came time for watering the kids were pretty good listeners and I only got sprayed twice by Joseph.

 Joseph got to help Camilla plant peas. She would make a hole with her finger to show him where the seed should go to make sure they weren't too close together. I'm pretty sure she learned that trick from planting with Gramma. It was so sweet watching them work together.

After being a crank all morning, Finley slept away the early afternoon allowing us to get some real work done! Before the kids went to bed they had to go check the garden to see if anything had grown. My Dad is totally right, it's all about the experience!