Little Moments

Peek-a-boo

Yesterday I was up very early.  I don't think I've been awake that early in a very long time.  I was rewarded greatly though with many sweet little moments throughout the day.  

Because we were up so early, even Camilla was a little sleepy.  We got to enjoy a little cuddling together on the couch while we watched some cartoons on low volume.  

Later on in the morning when we were both more awake, we had some fun tickling.  I just love Camilla's little giggles!! 

While I was feeding Camilla soup at lunch, she started playing a hilarious game of peek-a-boo with me from behind her sippy cup.  It was adorable.  

I also got a glimps of what things are going to be like with two.  I had the opportunity to watch the cutest little boy yesterday.  Camilla was so attentive to him and they played very well together.  He would drop his sippy, and Camilla would follow him around trying to give it back.  She brought him books and toys and was very good at sharing.  At one point, Camilla was playing with a rattle and hitting it on the Coffee Table.  The little  boy thought this looked super fun! He wanted to try, so he found a way to get the rattle.  It was neat just sitting back and watching how kids work things out.  Camilla took a step back from the table.  I could just read her thoughts.  First, she wasn't sure what to do, and looked a little taken back.  Then she saw how much fun the child was having with the rattle and a big smile came across her face.  She marched back up to the coffee table, decided to join in on the fun,  and started hitting it with just her hands.  The two of them played at the coffee table, drumming,  for quite a while together.  

Later in the evening, I had just pulled fresh bagels out of the oven.  I cut one open, smothered it in butter, and sat on the couch.  Camilla came and joined me.  I gave her some little pieces to eat of her own and she loved it!! I looked down at her, with her big, full cheeks of food and she looked back up.  Next thing I knew, my little girl was puckering up for a smooch.  I made my lips as big and kiss-like as I could get them and kissed my puffy cheeked, puckered up little girl right on the lips! 

I was carrying something into the house, and Camilla saw me and said "elp! elp!" and she came right over and hung onto whatever part she could grab so that she was "elping" me.  She's so aware sometimes! That makes me smile.

I'm so glad I get to witness these sweet little moments.  Sometimes, my eyes sting with happy tears just watching Camilla do these things.  I love that I am her Mum and that she trusts me.  What a special gift!  I can't wait to see what a great big sister my little girl is going to be!

Numbers and Water

Yesterday was a catch-up-on-the-last-three-weekends-of-sleep day.  I woke up feeling super drained of energy and had a headache still.  I snoozed on the couch for the morning while my very well behaved little girl hung out in the living room with her toys.  I'm so lucky.  When she went down for her nap, I hesitated, and then decided it would be a good idea to catch some more Z's.  Neither of us woke up until Mr. Stannix got home at 4:30.  I felt a lot more rested.  I woke up craving Subway.  Pizza sub with all the veggies except the icky olives and things at the very back.  Because Mr. Stannix loves me and could see how tired I was, he let me get one, as long as I brought him home a big mac.  Lets just say, I tasted the first half of my sub twice (ew).  But for some reason, was still able to finish the second half.  I guess that's just how much I was craving it.  I blame it on the pickles.

I left the girly with her Daddy while I ran out.  She was so glad to have him home when she woke up from her nap.  He's been getting all sorts of cuddles and kisses.  She loves him so much.  As I was pondering what to blog about today, and looking at pictures, I came across these and decided they would be perfect.

Mr. Stannix was bathing Camilla the other day, and I walked in to a little girl covered in numbers.  Daddy was teaching her about accounting!! This is a regular occurrence in our home.  One time while he was doing homework, she was up on his lap and he was explaining something or other to her about accounting.  It's cute watching them.  Her newest fascination is watching movie trailers online  on Daddy's lap.  I've never seen her sit so still. 

Miss Cj loves spending every second she can with her Daddy. This morning, she definitely cried a lot when he left the house for school.  She really didn't want him to leave.  She even snuggled in when he brought her into the room (her way of bribing us).  I'm so glad I have such a wonderful husband who loves his girls so much.  He works really hard for us and I'm grateful for that.  No matter how busy he is, he always makes time for his little girl, whether it's to bath her, snuggle her, dance with her, or play on the floor with her.  I'm glad I have a husband like that.  Daddy's are so special!

Trunk or Treat

 Last year for Halloween we dressed up as this...
In case you can't tell, Camilla is in the box thing.

We dressed our baby up as a mummy!!

Since Halloween was on a Sunday this year, we celebrated on Saturday night with a Trunk or Treat.  It was a lot of fun! Camilla was a little cow, and we were farmers.  We had no luck finding overalls at Value Village, so we improvised with whatever we could find at home.  It was so fun to dress up as a family and celebrate the holiday.  Camilla was the cutest little cow.  She could say "moo", "cheats" (treats), "ank-you" (thank-you).  She was cute!  Here's some pictures of our night!!  It's too bad you can't see her feet in these first pictures, because she's only wearing one sock!

"Mum, are you DONE yet?"

This is TOTALLY a Stannix pose.  I'm pretty sure I have a Halloween pic of Mr. Stannix when he was around this age, and his shoulders, facial expression and almost everything are the same.  So cute.

She even had a little tail that would wag as she walked.  

She would say "Moo" when asked what she was.  She was little miss independent as soon as we got to the church.  She walked around, checked out the kids and their costumes, and played with balloons.  I must say though, Mr. Stannix makes a pretty hunky cow boy!! 

Camilla met her little friend in the gym.  When she saw her she went "Roar" and ran up to her.  Her friend said "Moo".  It was funny watching them interact and chat with each other.  They were adorable!

After all the fun was done in the gym, the kids made their way out to the parking lot for the Trunk or Treat!  Camilla had a blast.  Her Daddy took her around from car to car.  She would say "cheat" and hold out her little bucket.  Then we would prompt her to say "thank-you" and she would go "ank-you" or something that would sound close, and move onto the next car.  We only went to about 5 cars and then she kept tripping and spilling her bucket, so we thought it was time to call it a night.  

When we got home, she stripped out of her costume and went for the "cheats".  She had a blast examining her loot before bed!  She would take it all out of her bucket, inspect it, play with it, and then put it all back in.  She was adorable.  I loved seeing how excited she was!

SO Ready!!

We've got a bucket for Camilla's candy, some gummy spiders, and some candy corn! 

The Stannix's are SO ready for Halloween!! 

I can't wait to dress Camilla up in her little cow suit and take her to the Trunk or Treat tonight!

There will definitely be a post full of fun pics in the very near future!

Happy Halloween Everyone!

One Sock Off

And One Sock On.... That seemed to be the theme of yesterday! Camilla has always hated wearing socks.  She takes them off a few minutes after I get them on, and one always gets lost somewhere until I do a major clean up.  At present, she has no matching socks in her drawer that actually fit her.  Recently, she discovered how to put her own socks on (always upside down for some reason).  Yesterday, she walked around all day with one sock off, and one sock on.  It was cute.  Some of her adventures yesterday included eating her cookie in a laundry basket in my bedroom, and climbing on the back of the couch (yikes).  She likes to use the couch as a slide, and it seems to have the perfect curve for it.  She climbs up, then gets ready to slide down and goes "weeee".  It's cute, but every time I hear her slide/plop on the couch my heart skips a beat in fear that she's fallen or hurt herself. 

Mr. Stannix was home a bit earlier than usual yesterday afternoon.  Before dinner, we had music playing on the computer and Camilla wanted all of her Daddy's attention.  She sat on his lap, chatted with him, and they danced!  My heart melted when Mr. Stannix spun his little girl around and dipped her in his arms.  It was the most adorable thing ever.  They continued to dance, and Camilla jumped, spun, bobbed, and shook her little diaper bum. Even when Daddy was tired, Camilla kept insisting that they dance.  It was cute.

Last night while I was brushing her teeth, I discovered two little lumps on the back top gums.  She is definitely cutting some molars.  She woke up twice from the time we put her to bed, to the time we went to bed.  I gave in at 1:00am and brought her to bed with us.  So, for a few hours, we had an extra body in our bed.  I have come to the conclusion that we really should invest in a Queen bed.  I put myself between the munchkin and Mr. Stannix so that her moving around wouldn't wake him up.  I lay squished between the two of them, with no covers (because our bedroom was sooo hot).  It was nice for a while.  I enjoyed cuddling, but I wasn't getting much sleep.  Alas, sleeping beauty returned to her own bed where she slept until 8:00 this morning.  (She did protest a little bit).  It was funny how as soon as I brought her into bed with me and snuggled her close, she had no problem sleeping. That little extra comfort was all she needed to get some much needed sleep.  I love snuggling my not-so-little-anymore little girl while she sleeps.  It's so...peaceful.  I have a feeling tonight might be a repeat, and the next, and possibly the next until this crazy molar comes in! I won't complain though, I get to snuggle my girly.

After her bath last night, she went into her diaper and jammies.  Her hair dried while we read scriptures.  Just before prayers, I was admiring my little girl.  The back of her hair was smooth and perfect for once, not the giant, fuzzy rats nest that it always is.  I ran my fingers through it, and the end curled up.  It was so pretty.  I love those little moments.  I love noticing the little details. 

Yesterday I was reading an inspiring blog that I love to check in on and she talked about taking time to listen to our children, and how they will teach us something new every day if we listen to them.  They can make us laugh, and smile too.  It really touched me, and as I've been listening to Camilla, I've enjoyed every moment of it.  She talks like she means it, even though I can't understand her most of the time.  It's fun to listen and to have "conversations" with her.  What a joy it is to be a Mum!

P.S.
You'll NEVER guess what Mr. Stannix did the other night.   Do you remember this post?  Well, when Mr. Stannix came home the other day, he admitted that he listened to some Christmas music on the bus!  I told him that I thought that was taboo until after his birthday.  He said, "Yes, well, playing it in the house is."  While he was working on his homework that night, I heard a Christmas song.  Not just one, but like, six.  Mr. Stannix played Christmas music until it woke Camilla up (or maybe her teeth woke her up).  He totally broke his own rule.  HaHa. So, that means I have permission now right?  As soon as Halloween is over...maybe.

P.P.S

And so it continues today.  One sock off, and one sock on.  I think I have the match to that sock in her sock drawer.  This kid cracks me up!!

Dear Mah-Mah and Bam-PA

Thank-you for getting Camilla a warm winter jacket.  She absolutely loves it.  So much, in fact, that she insists on wearing it inside the house all the time.  She likes to put it on, play with the zipper, take it off, play in it...  It's a hit!! It sure keeps her toasty warm (especially in the house).  I even got her to say "cheese" for you while I snapped a picture. She's such a big girl. I think she's starting to look a bit like me...  ;)

Cheeeeeese

Lots of Loves,
Your Daughter and Grand-daughter

A Spider on the Floor

Halloween must be close because I have found the creepiest spiders slinking around my house lately.  Last night before bed I had to remind myself that the things on my floor that look like spiders were actually just pieces of roast beef I had made into smaller pieces for Camilla that she threw off her tray at dinner.  One of them even made it's way into the living room.  It's just roast beef though...  Camilla was laying on the floor this morning watching the doodle bops and I got up to get her something to eat.  She followed.  I turned around the was face to face with a giant, brown, creepy lookin' spider.  Ya know, the one's that have the big black eyes and the long long legs.  ICK! I still shiver just thinking about it.  Camilla didn't see it and couldn't understand why I didn't want her to go into the living room.  I had no time to go find a shoe, so I used the only thing I could reach.  Camilla's toy vacuum/popper thing.  I ran over that spider like a hundred times before I actually hit it.  ew, ew, ew. I hate spiders.  Then it was into the paper towel and down the toilet for that big guy.  I tried Google to find a picture of a spider, but I couldn't even look at them with out getting creeped out. 

In lieu of these recent events, I decided it was time for a "Halloween" background.  Only a few more days to go! Miss Camilla is going as a cow for Halloween.  Last night Mr. Stannix came up with a brilliant idea for our costumes!!  Last year, he and I were Egyptians and we carried Camilla (who was wrapped like a "mummy") in a box with sticks through it.  It was pretty funny!!

Today I am off to make some bread and home made bagels.  I'm finally starting to be rid of the whole morning sickness thing and have felt almost back to normal.  Looking forward to spending some time with Camilla today.  I believe she's teething because she's very snuggly.

This is our shnazzy pumpkin Mr. Stannix and I carved this year.  We were going to do two hands on a butt... Looking back, we like this much better.  I think it looks strangely like Voldemort off of Harry Potter.  (I better make sure I spelled that right, or Mr. S will be on my case. Yep, I think I'm good).  Minus the mouth, I do think our pumpkin and Voldemort share a strange resemblance.  Maybe this is why Mr. Stannix picked this particular design? We had to shine the flashlight in it when we finished to make sure it was candle worthy...We had fun carving with the whole family.

Have fun getting ready for Halloween!! 

Let it Snow!!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Yesterday was the very first snow of the season.  It brought back memories of when I was a kid.  We would wake up to the first snow of the season and couldn't wait to get out and play in it!  We always had awesome snow drifts at the farm, some even big enough that we could jump off our jungle gym into them, or tunnel through them.  Those were the days.  As a teenager, I was often found out with friends being pulled behind a quad on a sled, or skis, or saucer with a rope.  We liked to make things interesting.  It didn't matter how cold it was, we were having too much fun to really notice.  Mr. Stannix was always found out on a rink playing hockey with friends/whoever was around.  He said he would spend ALL day out there, and sometimes miss lunch and not even notice.  We're excited to take Camilla sledding and out on the ice this winter!

Yesterday morning I had Christmas songs going through my head.  I wanted so badly to stick in a Christmas CD and sing along.  I LOVE Christmas music.  Mr. Stannix and I made a deal though, that we wouldn't play any Christmas music until after his birthday.  One more month....

Even though it was chilly outside yesterday, I couldn't resist suiting Camilla up in her new snow suit and boots and taking her outside to let her enjoy the snow.  We had such a fun time playing together.  She even helped me push the giant snow balls around and make a teeny snow man.  I'm so glad I got to share my love for the first snow with my little girly.  She looked so grown up truckin' around the yard in her little pink boots and puffy snow suit.  I can't believe how big she is! 

She came up to me today and gave me a hug for no reason and said "aww" like she always does as she rests her head on my shoulder.  I hugged her back and said "I love you Camilla! Can you say I love you?" and she goes "I  knowwwww".  It was too cute.  It made the five dirty diapers I had to change today all worth it!! Anyways,  Here's some pictures of my little snow angel!

Finding the snow man's nose!

Her look of surprise! 

My Basement Window

We've had another busy, fun filled weekend.  Yesterday was really chilly and today looked about the same.  It rained most of yesterday.  We went to dinner at a friends place and when we left at 9:30 it was still sprinkling rain.  When I woke up this morning, I looked up at the sky through my basement window and saw that it was grey and dreary looking outside once again.  Camilla was up a couple of times last night.  She either really hates her crib lately, or she's teething and looking for extra comfort.  Her and I snuggled on the couch for a few hours in the early morning.  Mr. Stannix is burnt out from so many mid-terms and so he decided to take a much needed morning off.  He got some extra sleep and tried to get rid of his headache.  Camilla watched her cartoons on a really low volume and I snuggled under and a blanket on the couch.  Our house didn't really get moving until 10:00 this morning.  When Mr. Stannix left, he asked if I wouldn't mind shoveling the walks for him today! I ran to the window, and saw this....

Look at all that white stuff!!! I cracked open the window and waited for Mr. Stannix to walk by and then said to him, "Are you sure I need to shovel, looks pretty clear to me!" He chuckled.  A part of me is sad that Fall is over.  But a part of me got REALLY excited for the Christmas season!!  I love when the cold weather comes because that means more using my oven to keep it warm down here, which means Christmas baking etc.  Today calls for some indoor activities such as house cleaning, and some hot chocolate!! Camilla is enjoying some dancing this morning...

Her poor teeth.  I think that's what's bothering her.  Hopefully she gets a good nap in today! She definitely didn't have a good sleep last night.  Hope this bout of teething doesn't last too long! Enjoy the snow everyone!!

Some Mommy Time

Yesterday morning we got invited out to the park with some friends.  I quickly changed out of my Pj's and got Camilla dressed warm and off we went.  It was fun to get out.  This particular friend has seven kids and one on the way (any day now!).  One of her little girls became Camilla's buddy the whole morning and took her down the slide, up on the gym, on the swings, in the sand and everywhere.  She was such a sweetheart and such a good big helper.  I enjoyed some time just visiting with the other ladies and watching the kids laughing and giggling together.  It was a beautiful, crisp fall morning.  The time out of our dark, chilly basement was much needed.

The last few days I've been feeling really down on myself again.  I've gone to bed practically in tears almost every night feeling very inadequate and wondering if I am really cut out for baby #2.  Am I ready? Can I teach this child the things I need to?  I just feel like I need to learn how to be a better mother to Camilla first.  As a one year old, she can really push your buttons, and let's just say that I haven't been the most patient with her these last few days.  Maybe that's why I feel so guilty.  I feel like I'm not treating my little girl as the Savior would want me to treat her.  I always feel guilty when I loose my cool, or raise my voice.  Just so many negative thoughts kept swirling through my mind and making me feel worse and worse about myself.  It's not just with Camilla, but I feel like my house isn't as clean as I would like it to be, and that I haven't been making the kind of meals that I would like to be making. When I discussed it with Mr. Stannix he assured me that probably every mother has these feelings of inadequacy and guilt at some point in their mothering careers.  This should have made me feel better, but I didn't want to believe him.  I was just so upset.  He also told me that I should take some time for myself here and there and that it's hard always being around Camilla.  I agreed, even though I didn't want to.  I never wanted to be one of those moms who needed to "escape" from the house and her children.  I always thought I would find the most joy and happiness being around my kiddies 24/7.  While I do love being home more than away, I do think that some time to myself here and there is a good idea.  Whether it's engaging in a hobby while she naps or studying my scriptures every morning, I think it will help.

After talking to Mr. Stannix, and attending enrichment last night and visiting with some ladies from the ward, I'm feeling better today.  It's time to change and kick those negative thoughts in the butt! Last night when I put Camilla to bed, she fell asleep in my arms again.  All the negative thoughts I had started to melt away.  I snuggled her close, studied her face, and gave her a kiss on the nose.  It's in moments like those that the true joy of motherhood comes.  As I watch her giggle and grin at me this morning, and snuggle and rock her baby, I realized that I'm not doing as bad of a job as I thought I was.  Hopefully someday I can become that woman that I want to be.  I think I will just keep learning, one day at a time, and the Savior will help me with the rest.  I really like this song as I listened to it this morning.  I thought it was very inspiring and motivating!  I also came across this quote in my studies this morning, and it's exactly what I needed.

 

"What can young mothers do to reduce the pressure of raising young children and enjoy their families more?"

"Recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction."

"Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: 'The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. . . . I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. 

I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less' "

~M. Russell Ballard~

I think that's been half of my problem.  I've been so concerned with "getting things done" that I have been too stressed out to enjoy the "doing".  I love being a mother, but there's no doubt that it comes with "hard and frustrating times".  I'm glad that I have Mr. Stannix, my own mother, and friends to discuss my frustrations and trials with.  I'm also glad for the power of prayer and the opportunity I have to talk to my Heavenly Father about my struggles and trials.  He's always there to listen and help.  I do love the special moments that I get to experience as a mother while I snuggle my little girl, watch her dance and giggle, and get special hugs from her.  This is where true joy is found.